ZELDA
I saw him first on a magazine
strong shoulders and a chin like a knife
I was so young but what does it mean
waiting for this my whole life
The only way to make it real
was the academy

Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one

Oh captain wait for me
captain I love you so
When I think of you
I can feel my nipples grow
But sometimes I see the stars, ask myself why
it takes so fucking long to get my nails dry

Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one
Captain you’re the one

ZORX
In my captain’s lounge I was hangin’ ‘round
the ship, the crew, homeward bound
standin’ at the window
All around just black

I was lookin’ for information
regarding bi-spectral disintegration
Zelda my bitch came up from behind
sweet as honey, tasty like wine
“Hey Zelda baby got some candy for you”
“Oh, what do I have to do?”
“Zelda honey you know me
how about a little podiatry?”

ZELDA
Ha-ha-ha Captain you’re the one!